Whiff of Hypocrisy
Climate warming is taken as a serious issue in Botley. After carefully studying "List of countries by carbon dioxide emissions per capita" (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_countries_by_carbon_dioxide_emissions_per_capita) it was felt that although the UK, ranked only 38th in the world with 9.4 metric tons per capita in 2003 (- compared to the USA, ranked 10th with 19.8 metric tons per capita, and much maligned China, ranked 109th with 3.2 metric tons per capita), the good citizens of Botley came up with with startling new proposals.
Cows, as noted by no less a person than President George W. Bush, are a major source of methane gas. As from 1st October, all the herds in Botley will be fitted with methane gas collectors and the gas stored until such time as technological improvements allow its use in automobiles.
The current Liberal Democrat proposal to increase tax on 4X4 vehicles to £2,000 per annum does not go far enough in penalising us as rural users. A new tax is proposed to cover the equine set. From 1st January 2007, horses, which also emit methane gas, will be subject to a horseshoe tax of £750 per annum, rising to £1500 for horses over 12 hands. Greenhouse gases emanating from dung heaps will, of course, be subject to a new Royal Commission, following an extensive fact finding tour of various exotic locations by MPs - some whose names even their own political parties have difficulty recognising.
A media law will be introduced in the Queen's Speech, creating a new offence of ridiculing important people, such as the Government, MPs and members of the Royal Family. The European Union will be excluded as that would be stretching credulity too far. Examples of potential offences include:
Questioning whether Chris Huhne, MP and tough shadow Environment spokesman for the Liberal Democrats, or his wife drives a BMW 7 car. And has he installed sources for renewable energy in all of his five properties.
Mentioning Price Andrew's, a.k.a. Air Miles Andy, frequent use of helicopters to travel to and fro golf courses.
Does the Prime Minister really need a motorcade with police outriders to get him from Downing Street to the House of Parliament?
Should Ministers use the Queen's Flight to get to Strasbourg?
Or suggesting that Michael O'Leary would be delighted to find space for all the above on Ryanair.
Cows, as noted by no less a person than President George W. Bush, are a major source of methane gas. As from 1st October, all the herds in Botley will be fitted with methane gas collectors and the gas stored until such time as technological improvements allow its use in automobiles.
The current Liberal Democrat proposal to increase tax on 4X4 vehicles to £2,000 per annum does not go far enough in penalising us as rural users. A new tax is proposed to cover the equine set. From 1st January 2007, horses, which also emit methane gas, will be subject to a horseshoe tax of £750 per annum, rising to £1500 for horses over 12 hands. Greenhouse gases emanating from dung heaps will, of course, be subject to a new Royal Commission, following an extensive fact finding tour of various exotic locations by MPs - some whose names even their own political parties have difficulty recognising.
A media law will be introduced in the Queen's Speech, creating a new offence of ridiculing important people, such as the Government, MPs and members of the Royal Family. The European Union will be excluded as that would be stretching credulity too far. Examples of potential offences include:
Questioning whether Chris Huhne, MP and tough shadow Environment spokesman for the Liberal Democrats, or his wife drives a BMW 7 car. And has he installed sources for renewable energy in all of his five properties.
Mentioning Price Andrew's, a.k.a. Air Miles Andy, frequent use of helicopters to travel to and fro golf courses.
Does the Prime Minister really need a motorcade with police outriders to get him from Downing Street to the House of Parliament?
Should Ministers use the Queen's Flight to get to Strasbourg?
Or suggesting that Michael O'Leary would be delighted to find space for all the above on Ryanair.
posted by Cobblers | 12:13 AM
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